The Psychotic Doctor

This writing is about how to 'heal' or to 'overcome' problems. What do you think is the process to overcome a problem? Is it a hit-and-miss process or this there rhyme and reason to the process? Is it God's will or 'Luck of the Draw'? I will attempt to write in a manner to convince both those who view problems as part of their religion experience and those who view problems as the 'Luck of the Draw' during the experience of life. I will use the term 'heal' referencing the religious and the term 'overcome' referencing the luck of the draw. As you will see, your chosen viewpoint makes little difference relative to the process of resolving problems (other than a religious person's feeling that God will help).

Many people wonder why they have problems in life; what is the purpose of problems; why do problems happen to otherwise good people. Religious people, who in their minds are attempting to live correctly (obey God's commandments) wonder why they have probles. People sometimes blame God or become angry with God or lose faith in God because of problems. Less or non-religious people do not target God for their problems, but often target some person or group as the cause of their problems and become angry or lose faith or cooperation with the person or group. Sometimes a person will become angry with a friend, a family member, a co-worker as if that person caused the problem. WHY we have problems is the subject of another writing.

There are probably many ways a person could classify how we as humans go
about communicating. However, to make matters simple let us just assume there are
two general methods. The first is verbal: The words that we say which, when we put
them together in a certain pattern, will have a meaning or meanings to someone else.
The second method of communication is non-verbal: Everything else besides the words
we are putting together in sentences.

There are those in the communication business who suggest that as much as 80%
or 90% of the total communication that occurs between people is non-verbal.
They suggest that the communication between people is highly involved with sending and
receiving information whih is not provided through words. Personally, I do not know if it is 80%
or 90%, but I certainly believe non-verbal communication comprises well over 50% of the
total provision of information between two people.

I was thinking as I was driving down the road about how people will ask another person when they meet the other person: "How are you?" Usually the other person will say: "I am fine." The person says they are fine because if the person said anything else, then person asking would probably not hear it, or if they did hear it then the asking person would likely be most uncomfortable because then s/he would have to listen for awhile.

I have learned over my life that people really do not care how you are. Now I am not trying to belittle anyone or hurt anyone's feelings. People do concern themselves about the welfare of others. I believe that. However, I also believe that everyone is so busy with their own problems, difficulties, issues going on in their life that they really do not have time to do a whole lot of listening or talking when they ask: "How are you?" and you anwer: "I am not doing too well." Answer that way and they become real antsy (unless they are a close friend). Give it a try. See what happens. Typically the person who is talking to you is overwhelmed by their own issues and problems, and they are doing pretty well, but they have a thousand things to do. They have got to go here: they have got to go there. They have to go to this meeting; they have to go to that meeting. They have got to help this person; they have this assignment and that assignment. They have lots to do and, therefore, they do not really care, or they do not have the time or energy to care. To my way of thinking "caring" is an ongoing process. It means that you make a day to day or an hour to hour, or at least every few days, effort to do something for the person or group about whom you profess caring.

Time to start a new year. You party animals already had the great evening out...yes? Or were you like me...in bed by the time it became 2007? Best Wishes to All in this New Year! May you be Prosperous, Content, Safe, Faithful, and Thankful.

Why do we fail with our New Year's Resolutions? Maybe because we REALLY DID NOT WANT whatever it was that we resolved? Or maybe we just get lazy? Or maybe we have no internal fortitude? Or maybe......??? Here is a question: If you cannot keep a promise to yourself, to whom can you keep a promise?

Some suggestions for making and keeping New Year's Resolutions....

This writing is about relationships; about serious, committed relationships or marriage. In this section I will talk about what occurs that causes a relationship/marriage to get going. What occurs that makes a relationship blossom and grow. I speak about heterosexual relationships because I am not certain that these comments will all fit gay relationships. Although certainly some
of these comments would be useful in any relationship.

Before I get to talking about the problems or difficulties that arise in a relationship or marriage, let us consider what occurs to get people to the point of deciding they are going to get married or have some serious relationship.

This writing is about relationships; about serious, committed relationships or marriage. In this portion of the subject I will talk about some of the pitfalls and problems I think cause relationships or marriages to self-destruct and/or have problems even though they may stay together. I speak about heterosexual relationships because I am not certain that these comments will all fit gay relationships. Although certainly some of these comments would be useful in any relationship.

It seems to me there are a number of reason for disruption and problems in a serious relationship. I use the word marriage from this point on even though those of you who are in serious relationships, but not legally married recognize that I am speaking about your situation as well. I just do not want to double up words all the time.

This writing is about relationships; about serious, committed relationships or marriage. In this portion of the subject I will offer thoughts about how to remain strong in a relationship.

It is possible to remain strong in a relationship or marriage; and it is possible to recover from difficulties. But it requires a concerted effort.